Wednesday 31 July 2013

How To Kill Off a Good Relationship


Every Wednesday, I try to share something inspiring that I have read online within the last week. This week is more like a cocktail of articles that I believe can enhance our relationships with people who question our belief in Jesus, The Christ, our friends and our family- in that order:
When you are asked if  Jesus is God?
Wednesday Weekly Rounds: Good Stuff You found online this week
So does the New Testament really teach that Jesus is God? The NT often uses “God” (Greek: theos) as synonymous with “God the Father”— and Jesus is not the Father. But the NT also frequently uses “God” as the more generic term for the divine nature. So “God” is not always a reference to the Son in particular, but the Son is always God.
There are several examples where Jesus is explicitly called God. Here are the clearest ones:
John 1:1, “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.”
John 20:28,”Thomas answered him, ‘My Lord and my God!’”
Romans 9:5,”To them belong the patriarchs, and from their race, according to the flesh, is the Christ who is God over all, blessed forever. Amen.”
Titus 2:13, “waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Saviour Jesus Christ”
Hebrews 1:8,”But of the Son he says, ‘Your throne, O God, is forever and ever, the sceptre of uprightness is the sceptre of your kingdom.’”
2 Peter 1:1,”To those who have obtained a faith of equal standing with ours by the righteousness of our God and Saviour Jesus Christ”
But the evidence for Jesus’ divinity is hardly limited to these examples where he is explicitly identified as God. You can read the complete article here

Pete Wilson really nailed it here with how jealousy and making assumptions can kill off the best friendship. Who hasn’t been there- either at the giving or receiving end?  He said:
                How do you destroy a relationship?
Step One: Make Assumptions.
I recently received an email from an old friend who was upset with me. I’m not really at liberty to talk details, but it turned out to all be one BIG misunderstanding. In fact, he had made a series of assumptions which turned out to be completely false. At the end of the day I was just relieved we were able to work through the conflict, but it got me thinking.
Assumptions are the silent deadly bombs that do nothing but destroy healthy relationships. An assumption is one person’s IDEA of what someone else is thinking, feeling or doing.
Parents often assume they know exactly what their children feel, think or want. Bosses may assume employees know exactly what they want when they ask for something. Church attendees assume they know exactly what the pastor’s motives are. All of this is mind-reading or assuming and it is dangerous.
While you may be right from time to time, more often your assumptions lead to unnecessary conflict, worry, and broken relationships.
So today I just want to encourage you to stop and think. Instead of making assumptions how about asking questions?
Few days later, he dropped another piece that is definitely worth a look: the green eyed monster.
So, if you have a really good relationship you just want to destroy:
1.       Make Assumptions
2.       Get Jealous- it will guarantee you to do stupid stuff.
If the relationship is worth keeping, see that you avoid number 1 and 2.
Apart our relationship with God, the next most important one would be our relationships with our spouse. Especially for the singles, this piece helps us to put marriage preparation in focus before scurrying down the aisle:
It’s that time of year again. People seem to be marrying off like rabbits (at least from my news feed). Facebook has been lighting up with pictures of brides and bridal parties, and it is fun to see all the smiles and happy celebrations. Occasionally, an engagement announcement will pop up, and my first thought is, I wonder if they’re ready? I don’t mean it in a judgmental or even critical way. I just wonder what makes a couple ready for marriage.
Certainly, no one enters marriage with complete confidence that they are ready for all that awaits. There are all sorts of unknown variables that even the most calculating person couldn’t possibly anticipate. One of the great mysteries of marriage is that it’s a commitment made in trust. You must trust yourself, your new spouse, and God — the giver of marriage. But are we left to only trust and take the leap? Or is there a way of knowing if we are really ready for marriage?
Andrew Hess of The boundless blog cracked me up on “people marrying off like rabbits…” but the rest is really informative and relevant to both single and married people.

What have you found inspiring online this week? Please drop a note in the comments section.
Enjoy the rest of your week.

Picture from: christpinoy.blogspot.com
PS: The aim of Wednesday weekly rounds is to share with you things I came across online and found useful. It could also be a way of saying that “if I can’t share it on this platform”, I should rethink reading it.
Would you be able to freely share what you have been reading online in the past week? If you consider it inappropriate to be shared amongst believers, maybe you shouldn’t be reading it to start with.
PPS: The usual disclaimer: I am not affiliated or endorsing the people mentioned in this post. As you know, they are waaaayyyy out of my league J






Tuesday 30 July 2013

10 SHADES OF FALSEHOOD


You can NOT cover Lagos-Benin in 2hrs- map from google
Lagos traffic reveals the human heart. If you happen to take public transport on a Friday night, be ready to see, hear and experience a lot of strange things. It is not unusual to board a bus with someone who feels everyone must know his/her personal opinion on religion, politics and the economy. (I’m not talking about those who make really loud personal phone calls. Those people belong to a different category.) Some other people consider BRT buses the perfect place to render an audio version of their autobiography- right from the Civil War till date.
If you remove the embellishments, you can actually learn a bit of history but asides that, it can quickly become a competition on the person with the most interesting story on personal relationships with celebrities or popular politicians, disarming armed robbers, near death experiences, ritual killings, and other stuff. Many of us know these entertainers are lying through their teeth but we just keep quiet. However, my experience on Friday shows that folks are just tired of the tale-spinners they meet every day. Trust me; the dude in question is not likely to spin another tale any time soon. I will relay what happened in a bit.
For a while now, I have been considering doing a series on falsehood. After giving it some thought, I realised that falsehood goes beyond telling a lie. I thought and still think that the topic may turn out to require several posts to do it justice and I did not want to entangle myself with that but the young man I shall call Nnamdi clearly showed me that its high time we considered the issue of falsehood-among Christians.
I was in one of those long civilian buses that ply Oshodi- Sango route. If you have ever been on one, you will know that the number of people who stand is almost double the number of people who sit in the bus. Nnamdi was one of those standing. Now, normally, Oshodi to Sango shouldn’t take more than an hour but Friday nights in Lagos are anything but normal. You know how you grind your teeth as you realise that you have spent 45 minutes on almost the same spot. Now that I think about it, it is probably this frustration fires the imagination of tale spinners.
Anyway, we had just driven past Ikeja along when out of the blues, I heard Nnamdi’s clear voice “I once drove from Lagos to Benin in less than two hours.” It was quiet. All was still. Brethren, people were stunned! I know I was. Two hours! I can’t even begin to explain this to someone who is not familiar with the terrain but let me say that there are at least two big states between both locations: Ogun and Ondo states. I have attached a map to this post but I doubt if it will do justice to the issue at hand.
When one of us recovered his faculties, he asked (more like confronted) Nnamdi on how in the heavens he achieved this feat. Obviously, the young man did not expect anyone to take him up on the matter so to cover up his miscalculated speech; he launched into talks about speedometers, car models, kilometres, state of the road and other excuses. Trust Lagosians. They ‘oohed’ and ‘ahhed’ at the appropriate time to deliver the right amount of shame. Nnamdi was flustered but he couldn’t stop. He picked up his phone and called an anonymous friend to corroborate his report. When everyone yelled for him to put the phone on speaker “so we can ask your friend questions”, Nnamdi pocketed his phone and his voice dipped remarkably. To say it was embarrassing is an understatement. I blushed for him!
Why this matter really touched me was the fact that, without being asked, five minutes before the outlandish statement that ruined the night, Nnamdi had pointed out his church “where I go every Sunday” to everyone in the bus. Who asked him? When the events unravelled, I felt that another one of my brothers had shamed Jesus in a public bus. Indeed, in the multitude of words, there wanteth not sin.
Now that you have the background statement story, permit me to run a series on the issue of falsehood. Bear in mind that I do not write as a Pharisee, but as one whom the Spirit of God has convicted on the same issue in recent times. Typing this just hurt my pride. I wasn’t spinning tales, I was ‘withholding’ information- am I making excuses? I hope not- that’s even worse. Sometimes, one can approach the issue of privacy without wisdom and slip into telling lies- or withholding information which in itself could turn into falsehood.
As a matter of fact, falsehood has layers that range from subtle misinformation to blatant lies (ask Nnamdi). Is there any difference in these types of lies? Technically, No. I do not mean that I excuse one type of lie for the other. I only think that the differences between them lie in how they are able to sneak up on us without us realising that we just told a lie: for example, if I am working on my next blog post during official working hours but I leave the company’s e-mail window open so I can quickly make a switch when anybody appears to walk in my direction, am I lying? Yes, I am.
Falsehood is not a laughing matter. I believe it is one of the little foxes that can rubbish the testimony of a child of God and limit the extent to which such person can be used by the Holy Spirit. Jesus Himself stated that the devil is the father of all liars. We cannot claim to have God as our Father and still want the devil to adopt us. That is not a spiritually legal triune relationship. It can’t work. It won’t work and since God respects the will of a man, continuing in falsehood may just be us insisting on whom we want to call daddy.
If the Holy Spirit is convicting you of falsehood or any other sin, rejoice first and then repent. For at least, I take it to mean that my conscience has not been seared beyond repair. Then I still have hope. God is still interested in me. I fear for and pity the man whom the Holy Spirit no longer pricks his conscience on sin. That man deserves the world’s pity for he is a tragedy that has happened, waiting only to be revealed.
Has God at anytime convicted you of lying or any form of falsehood? Do you have a testimony of overcoming falsehood? Share your thoughts in the comments section, and strengthen other readers.

I leave you In God’s care,
Miss. August